Can their empathy come back?

I should have known that something was wrong years ago, when I told him I had skin cancer, and he said nothing. I had to make him hold me. 

When I fell down the stairs and broke my leg in 3 places years ago, he didn't come to the hospital because "I was dead anyhow".

But since he has had to stop working due to FTD and losing his license, I have seen moments of empathy. Putting his hand on my shoulder when I cried one day. Asking if I slept well. 

Just moments, but still...

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a not-so-fun experience...

We went grocery shopping yesterday, and first we went to Shoppers Drug Mart to buy pop on sale. We picked up a few more items on sale. We had brought in a cloth shopping bag, so he put our purchases in there. Then we went to the Superstore for the rest of our groceries, and he carried in the plastic bins we use when grocery shopping, and put them into the shopping cart. When I went to put something into the bin while we shopped, I realized he had moved some of the Shopper's purchases (bacon, hotdogs, eggs) into the bins, and brought them in with us! No idea why?? So I am feeling a bit panicky, thinking how will I get them out of the store without having to pay for them again!? I tried to explain the problem to him, so he grabs them and starts heading for the door, saying he will take them back to the car. No! You can't just walk out with them! Visions of him being arrested for shoplifting! So he gives them back to me and takes off to look for the receipt in the car. Back...

When I am sick

I've been up all night in pain and throwing up, and he took my basin away when I finally fell asleep on the couch! I was cleaning the basin out each time so that's not his excuse. So, I woke up so nauseous, discovered it was gone and called out to him. He was just in the next room, but no response. My throat is sore and raspy, but I keep calling. Finally, after about the 10th time, he answers me, and I ask him to bring back my basin. No idea what I am talking about. Argh, I am so nauseous, my throat is so sore, but I try to explain what I need. I pat the couch next to me, explaining the basin I had right here, that you took away. Blank look... Oh, he says finally, you want a cloth. No, the basin! Before I throw up all over the couch! It's hard enough being sick and having to take care of yourself, and the dogs. He is supposed to only be in early stages

Tip #4: Keep a “To Go” kit ready and easy to grab

Tip #4: Keep a “To Go” kit ready and easy to grab Your To Go kit should include two main groups of things. Photo courtesy of Pexels. One group will include paperwork, such as: Advance health-care directives such as a Living Will and copies of the medical order forms Common medical orders forms such as the DNR (Do-Not-Resuscitate) and POLST (Physician Orders for Life Sustaining Treatment) A medication list A copy of your medical power of attorney form It’s never a bad idea to have a copy of their ID card and insurance card as well The other main group of things to put inside of your To Go bag are items that will make the ER visit less boring for you and for your person — things that might make you both more comfortable. For you, items like a phone charger, book, snacks and water — maybe a small travel blanket or neck pillow. Also pack a pen or pencil and pad of paper to take notes and document important things. For your person, take something that makes them comfortable or reminds t...

Rob's Dementia Journey with FTD

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